Thursday, 30 August 2012

#5 - Highlander and Spongebob: So to speak


So, we (probably) all know that Bart Simpson is voiced by a lady. A (presumably) nice lady called Nancy Cartwright.

But tell me, my friends - What's the link between Highlander and Spongebob?

Don't give me that 'Which Higlander?' malarky. As far as I'm concerned, MacLeod was correct - there really WAS 'only one'.




Clancy Brown as The Kurgan


Anyway, the answer is: This guy - this guy right here. He's also Mr Eugene H Krabbs.



Clancy Brown as Mr Krabbs.
(Makeup is truly awesome nowadays.)




The Kurgan is Mr Krabbs.

Weird, huh?


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When I was younger, I played a game on PC called 'Baldur's Gate II'. It was the first time I'd ever encountered the Advanced Dungeons and Dragons system, and I got right into it. Long story short, you travelled around the world slaying stuff and talking to bizarre characters who would sometimes join you, the player. Eventually Bioware (this is back when they made actual games instead of fancy slideshows with crappy endings) released an expansion for the game, called 'Throne of Bhaal'.

In 'Throne of Bhaal', you find out that one of your previous enemies named Sarevok is actually your half-brother, who then joins your party. He's a complete hardass. And it felt like it, too. See, it was voice acted by some awesome talent (more on that later) and they would all say things based on whatever was happening to your party at the time.


Sarevok = hardass brother from hell, literally. 


For example: When a character in your party is hit by an attack, they might make an 'Ugh!' or 'Oof!'noise. If they were low on health, they would say things like "I could really use some help over here!", or "I require your assistance.". Which is kind of funny, because they've accidentally also said 'I require your ass'. Anyway, my favourite part is how they communicated the general personality of each character by the thing they said when you click-on/select each of them. The bard would say something like 'How may I assist you, my pretty little raven-dove?' (because Bards are overly wordy wankers. Yes, I'm a Lvl 36 bard. Shut up.), the low-confidence magic-user would say something like 'I just KNOW I can help!', and the crazy ranger would say "Butt kicking, for goodness!". When your character dies, they yell a loud and painful yell.

I'm sure you can imagine the type.

And you'll need to, because I can't find any good links for any of this stuff.


"GO FOR THE EYES, BOO - GO FOR THE EYES! (Squeeeeaaak!)"- yelled by Minsc (and Boo).
Actual in-game quote. AWESOME.

But not Sarevok. Oh, no - never Sarevok. When he gets hit, he LAUGHS. He literally laughs. Because 'as if you could defeat me!'. When he is about to die from his wounds, he yells "HEAL MY WOUNDS NOW!", and when he dies he says through gritted teeth "NO! I - REFUSE!"

"Gritted teeth? Why would a voice actor grit his teeth? He's not an actor, nobody is looking at him." thought a younger Paddy. "I see now - because he is voice ACTING. It's not just turning up and saying some stuff. It's getting into the role, and preparing, and all that stuff. But no-one sees your face."


Whoever that voice actor was, I liked his work. So, I checked the game manual for the voice acting credits. And it wasn't there. That moment right there, I vowed to find out his name. But this was (just) before the internet allowed us to research things of that nature, so all I could think to do was keep an ear out for the rest of my life (I'm not real smart and stuff).

Fast Forward to The Matrix. There was an animated DVD release called The Animatrix, and it featured a selection of 9 different stories which took place in The Matrix universe. One of them was called 'Final Flight Of The Osiris', which was (unsurprisingly) about the last voyage of an airship called 'The Osiris'- and I knew I'd heard the voice of the captain before.

It was that guy, the one who played Sarevok.

I think that might be the only time that anyone has ever stopped the feature just so they could look at the credits.

I found out his name is Kevin Michael Richardson, and here's a clip of his work on Final Flight Of The Osiris (assuming it doesn't get taken down):

Final Flight Of The Osiris trailer on YouTube

(Skip ahead to 3:30 if you wish to go directly to the Osiris part to hear his voice)

And he looks like this:

 Kevin Michael Richardson, who is unbelievably not related to Craig Charles.
(thanks to Johnno for that gag)

As he should.

Fast Forward again, to when The Cleveland Show first came out. This Family Guy spin-off show features a whole cast of characters, and I was curious as to who voices Cleveland. Cleveland is a (usually) softly-spoken black man who has a very slight southern accent (and an annoying son).

Here's the trailer for the first season for those who haven't seen the show, so you can hear his voice:

The Cleveland Show Season 1 trailer

(Did you recognise the voice of Seth Green? He plays Chris, the son from Family Guy.)

Here's a picture of the guy who plays Cleveland Brown, who surprised the hell out of me by looking nothing like I thought he would:

Mike Henry, the voice of Cleveland Brown.
Also: WTF, Universe?

Did you know that Kanye West was on The Cleveland Show, as a character called 'Kenny West'? Check this out or not or whatever:

Kenny West and Cleveland Brown Jr - Mic Battle

So, you (most likely) know what Kanye looks like. I'd like you to, in your head, imagine the face of the person who voices Cleveland Jr. What does he look like, do you think?

Now watch this clip about the recording of the above Mic Battle:

Cleveland Brown Mic Battle: Behind The Scenes

If the guy who voices Cleveland Jr looks familiar, it's because you were just looking at a picture of him: it's Kevin Michael Richardson.


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Most people have 'favourite actors'. I have 'favourite voice actors, and also Tim Curry' instead, because I think it would have a higher degree of difficulty and that voice actors don't get anywhere enough credit. Literally. Like in the game manual for Baldur's Gate II, which I mentioned earlier. Also, because I have minor hipster tendencies. But mainly the credit-where-it's-due thing.

(If you know actors well enough to know that Tim Curry does plenty of voice-work, and want to share that with me because you're a pedant, then please punch yourself in the face instead. Because STYLE, bitch.)

Here is some pretty bizarre voice actor trivia from the two main voice actors from Curious George, which may or may not actually align properly.  I even added bullet points because I love you:


Curious George Voice Actor List Of Surprisingness
Actor Character Also known as the voice of: From:
Frank Welker Curious George
  • Megatron / Soundwave
  • Brain / Dr Claw
  • Abu
  • Nibbler
  • Original Transformers series
  • Original Inspector Gadget series
  • Disney's Aladdin
  • Futurama
Jeff Bennet Man In The Yellow Hat
  • Dr Steinman
  • Kyle Katarn
  • Johnny Bravo
  • Bioshock
  • Jedi Knight games
  • Johnny Bravo, animated series


FUN FACT: Flea, the bass player from the Red Hot Chili Peppers voices the jungle boy 'Donnie', in the Wild Thornberries.

Here are some voice actors from BGII that you might know from their other works, in no particular order. This isn't about how awesome BGII is ('very' - thanks for asking), but about reading the lists below and saying "Hey, I didn't know that Ghostface was Mojo Jojo!" or "Wow - a Jem And The Holograms reference!" or not or whatever. I only add the BGII references as a framing device for the list - if you haven't played the game, the list should still make sense.



Baldur's Gate II Voice Actor List Of Awesomeness:
BGII NPC Actor Also known as the voice of From
Aerie Kath Soucie
  • Cubert Farnsworth
  • Kanga
  • Phil and Lil
  • Minx
  • Futurama
  • Winnie The Pooh
  • Rugrats
  • Jem and the Holograms

Keldorn Roger L Jackson
  • Ghostface (Voice)
  • Mojo Jojo
  • Abraham Lincoln

  • Scream
  • PowerPuff Girls
  • Sam and Max

Anomen Rob Paulson
  • Pinky
  • Boober Fraggle / Sprocket / Marjory the Trash Heap
  • Spike



  • Pinky And The Brain
  • Fraggle Rock

  • The Land Before Time



Yoshimo Maurice LaMarche
  • Brain
  • Kif Kroker / Lrrr / Morbo (and others)
  • Vekk
  • Mr Freeze
  • Pinky And The Brain
  • Futurama
  • Guild Wars: Eye of the North
  • Batman: Arkham City
Mazzy Jennifer Hale
  • Female Commander Shepard
  • Samus Aran
  • Jean Grey

  • Mass Effect games
  • Metroid Prime games
  • Wolverine and the X-Men

Viconia / Nalia Grey DeLisle
  • Mandy
  • Azula
  • Jeanette / Therese
  • Ms Marvel / The Enchantress
  • Catwoman
  • Kahlee Sanders /Dalatrass Linron
  • Female Wizard (Player)
  • Grim Adventures of Billy & Mandy
  • Avatar: The Last Airbender)
  • Vampire: The Masquerade - Bloodlines
  • Marvel Super Hero Squad
  • Batman: Arkham City
  • Mass Effect 3
  • Diablo III

Minsc Jim Cummings
  • Winnine The Pooh (and Tigger too!)
  • Captain Mathias
  • Thanos

  • Winnie The Pooh
  • Dead Space: Downfall
  • Marvel Super Hero Squad




That's right, folks: Winnie The Pooh is The Avatar Of Death. Try not to think about that when you go to sleep. Ever. You're welcome.


FUN FACT: Mike Patton, solo artist and vocalist from Faith No More, Tomahawk, and Mr Bungle (and the list goes on - oh, boy does it go on) was the voice of the zombies from the Will Smith film 'I Am Legend', and also from the game "Left 4 Dead". He was also the 'voice' of The Darkness from the game of the same name.

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But my current favourite voice actor of all time (I got that from 'Tautologies R Us', thanks) can't be found on Wikipedia, or IMBD. Indeed his internet prescence is much smaller than his works would suggest. Some have said the same about me, but they're wrong because I currently have the keyboard. Oh, and a Soundcloud account. And clips on YouTube (kind of). Where's YOURS? Also: HA-HA! Unless you have them, in which case I say: "You are already a success in my eyes, which are a very handsome shade of brown. Oh, so very very handsome."

In any case, observe this little comedy gem about what Boba Fett might get up to in his spare time (you might need to press play on the screen/link/etc.):

In A Neighbourhood Not So Far Away...

Watch the credits for the 'hey broo, git in tha kitchen and cook me sem iggs' bit, and see his awesome face.

(Also, you can thank Joffre Street Productions for that fantastic little skit by hiring them to record stuff for you.)

So what if I already knew David 'Q-Dog' Quinn? So what if I call him Quinnie instead of (the equally awesome moniker of) 'Q-Dog'? So what if we were already pals?

Should I not enjoy his work merely because I know him? How does that even make sense?

And yet that's how it works, isn't it?

We friend-zone artists all the time.

Even when we already know them.

In fact, I'd even go as far as to say: Especially when we already know them.


"Dammit, that is NOT what I meant by Friend Zone, and you know it."
FUN FACT: This is the first picture on this blog that doesn't feature a bald dude in it. Seriously.


You would think that familiarity bred support and word-of-mouth, but no - it does indeed breed contempt.  Well, maybe not contempt - but definitely indifference. Even in other artist friends. Indeed, what you've just witnessed is me realising/admitting that I friend-zone my artist friends, and my discomfort at the knowledge.

(Dammit, didn't I already cover this in another blog? How deep does my well of talent-blindness go, anyway? BAH!)

When we friend-zone artists, 2 things happen (he said, wanting to sound smart but just coming off as preachy):

1) We miss out on their works.
2) They miss out on revenue.

Even if you only care about one of those things, you can surely see that they are both connected.

I haven't followed Quinnie's career as closely as I might have, but I recently interviewed him (more on this after the blog, stick around - there's cake. I PROMISE.) and was frankly astounded at the amount of his work that I've missed out on so far. Many of those involve stage acting - and I can never see them now because I've missed out on my chance.

Some might say: "You're jumping on a bandwagon, Paddy". Well, to those people I say "If I intend to be a paying customer, then I'm pretty sure the ticket master (or whatever bandwagons have, or however the hell this analogy is supposed to work) will happily accept my money, friend or not. Also, your clothes are stupid. And your face. Your ridiculous ridiculous face, you goofy-looking bastard you.".




"But what should I use a picture of?"
"Anything at all - it doesn't matter. You just need to break the words up."
"Okay, so what about the caption?"
"Just use anything, it doesn't matter."
"Anything?"
"ANYTHING."
"Ummm... Like, this conversation?"
"No, not like this conv- actually, you know what? YES. Use this conversation. Problem solved. Good day, sir."
"But what if there's som-"
"I SAID GOOD DAY, SIR!"


Ultimately: It's nice to hear that someone loves your work, it really is - it really, really is - but banks and supermarkets really couldn't care less about stuff like that.

Seriously - ask them.



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I was recently on Facebook, and somebody (a certain legend who shall remain nameless because I don't want to overuse his name in this blog) mentioned the comic 'Greener Pastures', which is a classic tale about a country boy moving to the city. Also, the country boy is actually a Minotaur type of fellow - a human body with bull's head and all that.

It remains one of the few comics that I've ever read that are set in Australia. I'd forgotten all about it, and I started wishing I had followed it more. I started thinking: "Oh, I'll never be able to collect them all, there must be so many by now!" I commented on the thread/post, and was eventually able to contact the very polite and humble Tim McEwen, creator of the 
Greener Pastures series. It turns out that there aren't as many as I'd thought. At first, I was relieved. Then I was disappointed.

Then I was disappointed in myself., Oh Son, was I ever disappoint. (sic)

Maybe if I'd bought more, something more could have happened with it. Who knows who may have overseen me reading it, and become interested, and then later on been in a position to have turned it into a movie? It's not that crazy an idea - something similar must have happened at some stage with Footrot Flats. Blah blah blah, 'the butterfly effect', blah blah blah.

I told him how I felt, and what I'd taken away from the comic, what certain scenes meant to me, and how it had affected me when I was younger. He replied that he was happy that I had gained some insight into the world from his comics when I was younger, and thanked me very much for contacting him and letting him know, because that meant something to him.  I've since ordered the entire Greener Pastures series run from him. How could I not?

When you tell someone you like their work, it means something.


According to many film school students, *this* also means something.
But they can't agree on what, exactly.
So they don't get any pie.


Consider This: When you actually buy their work/service/product/whatever, that also means something.

Something different.


Maybe not something better as such, but certainly something that society seems to count as success.

In reality, you're always voting with your wallet, because it's impossible not to. To me, that's why piracy is ethically incorrect. Not because of 'The Law', which can go and take a large rusty (SECTION REMOVED BY ORDER OF THE COURT) until it prolapses, but because every single cent that you throw at an artist increases the amount of time that they can keep creating the work that you're enjoying.


(If you treat piracy as a try-before-you-buy type of deal, and then follow up on it - well, I can dig that.)

My point is that we live in a world where Megatron became Curious George - if Frank Welker had never been Megatron, then he probably wouldn't have been Curious George either. Perhaps. Maybe. Possibly.

Work with me here, dammit.

"I guess there really was 'More Than Meets The Eyes' to Megatron."
(cue canned laughter)
"Thanks folks, I'll be here all week."

By this same logic: It is my fault that David Quinn didn't get to voice Bane in the new Batman movie.

And I am very sorry for that -  because that WOULD HAVE BEEN F*CKING AWESOME.

Still...

At least we got to see him as Boba Fett - so to speak.



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(Liam 'Paddy' Padmore is a Level 36 Bard who performs the voice of Liam 'Paddy' Padmore in all his public appearances. See him, know him, love him.)

*All images in this document were taken from Wikipedia, and all clips link to YouTube. The author of this blog blah blah blah legal stuff blah blah blah*




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The next batch of Who's Your Paddy blogs will feature a series of interviews with local artists/producers/etc. They will be asked 13 questions, in a marvellous word-orgy of knowledge, laughter, and (insert other enticing thing HERE) called 'Luck Of The Irish', because 'Paddy', dammit.


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